I think sometimes you can be scared to be happy, for fear that it will only be temporary. Good things come and go and when you get so many good things in concession with each other, surely your time of fortune is set to be up soon. That's how I feel about this summer. This summer has literally been the most incredible three months of my life. I have never ever felt so free; from responsibility, from obligations, from everything. My only obligation at the moment is to be happy. But it has to end and I have to leave. Okay, happiness can be a choice but when everything that makes you happy is soon not going to be in reach, what can you do? Because I've been given this life to live for three months, this dream and now I have to wake up and leave.
So I moved to Prague for the summer as you may or may not know. And in all of that time I have become the person I was always meant to be; my happiest self. The thing is, happiness and freedom come hand in hand together, and the key to both of those things is letting go. Sure we all have baggage, we wouldn't be who we are now without a few suitcases of troubles dragging behind us but its learning to brush off the dust, open them up and free them from you, rather than carrying them and letting the weight of them drag you down. But I learnt this summer that perspective is everything too. Looking back on things that happened in the past is all part of growing, but how you are viewing them is all that matters. To be blunt... Shit happens. The sooner you accept that the sooner you can learn to let go of it. Everything happens for a reason and if you open your mind enough, life will reward you with new hellos and new experiences that will become the life you know now.
So I am leaving Prague in only a week and a half and it's going to be one of the hardest things I will ever have to do in my life. I am settled here, I'm happy and I'm at home. The people I've met have become part of my everyday life, the freedom of having my own apartment with my best friends; the ability to travel where and whenever I can, and of course best of all... the ridiculously cheap price of beer! All of these things I am giving up to leave when it's the last thing I want to do. Why don't I just stay then some would ask? But sometimes life doesn't work in our favour and no matter how much we want something we cant always just get it. We have to work for it. So my temporary plan at the moment... come home and sort my life out. To be exact, I have the goal of living abroad again by the start of the year. I hope that by the end of January, I will be settled in either Prague or Berlin au pairing, because they are my favourite cities in the world and why not?! My family and friends mean the absolute world to me, but England doesn't. My heart belongs elsewhere now and I learnt once I started traveling that I could never feel truly at home again, because I have an adventurous heart that belongs to new experiences, and the people I have met along the way. Besides, when it comes to family and friends, distance is irrelevant when people are that important.
Okay so I might just be talking myself into believing this, but I need to see this big step of leaving as a positive thing. Not see it as everything that I love I am leaving, but rather that I just have something to work my way back to getting again. Use this as my motivation. It's going to be so hard, and it's hard to put into words. I need to appreciate what I've been lucky enough to experience, because right now I'm at my happiest. Nothing lasts forever but I am so so grateful for this opportunity that came my way. I have changed, because my mind-set has changed. I've learnt to live in the moment and it's the greatest and most freeing feeling I've ever felt. That's why I love traveling, and living in an unfamiliar place; you are completely free and you get to meet the most incredible people. It would take so long to list the amount of people I've been lucky enough to meet, like passing ships in the night who I may or may not ever speak to again. That's the price you pay for traveling. Accepting that every hello will either end in a goodbye or a see you soon. And it all just depends on which you choose. I choose not to say goodbye to Prague... But rather see you soon. 
So I moved to Prague for the summer as you may or may not know. And in all of that time I have become the person I was always meant to be; my happiest self. The thing is, happiness and freedom come hand in hand together, and the key to both of those things is letting go. Sure we all have baggage, we wouldn't be who we are now without a few suitcases of troubles dragging behind us but its learning to brush off the dust, open them up and free them from you, rather than carrying them and letting the weight of them drag you down. But I learnt this summer that perspective is everything too. Looking back on things that happened in the past is all part of growing, but how you are viewing them is all that matters. To be blunt... Shit happens. The sooner you accept that the sooner you can learn to let go of it. Everything happens for a reason and if you open your mind enough, life will reward you with new hellos and new experiences that will become the life you know now. 
So I am leaving Prague in only a week and a half and it's going to be one of the hardest things I will ever have to do in my life. I am settled here, I'm happy and I'm at home. The people I've met have become part of my everyday life, the freedom of having my own apartment with my best friends; the ability to travel where and whenever I can, and of course best of all... the ridiculously cheap price of beer! All of these things I am giving up to leave when it's the last thing I want to do. Why don't I just stay then some would ask? But sometimes life doesn't work in our favour and no matter how much we want something we cant always just get it. We have to work for it. So my temporary plan at the moment... come home and sort my life out. To be exact, I have the goal of living abroad again by the start of the year. I hope that by the end of January, I will be settled in either Prague or Berlin au pairing, because they are my favourite cities in the world and why not?! My family and friends mean the absolute world to me, but England doesn't. My heart belongs elsewhere now and I learnt once I started traveling that I could never feel truly at home again, because I have an adventurous heart that belongs to new experiences, and the people I have met along the way. Besides, when it comes to family and friends, distance is irrelevant when people are that important.
Okay so I might just be talking myself into believing this, but I need to see this big step of leaving as a positive thing. Not see it as everything that I love I am leaving, but rather that I just have something to work my way back to getting again. Use this as my motivation. It's going to be so hard, and it's hard to put into words. I need to appreciate what I've been lucky enough to experience, because right now I'm at my happiest. Nothing lasts forever but I am so so grateful for this opportunity that came my way. I have changed, because my mind-set has changed. I've learnt to live in the moment and it's the greatest and most freeing feeling I've ever felt. That's why I love traveling, and living in an unfamiliar place; you are completely free and you get to meet the most incredible people. It would take so long to list the amount of people I've been lucky enough to meet, like passing ships in the night who I may or may not ever speak to again. That's the price you pay for traveling. Accepting that every hello will either end in a goodbye or a see you soon. And it all just depends on which you choose. I choose not to say goodbye to Prague... But rather see you soon. 
